· Amy Webb was having no luck with online dating. The dates she liked didn't write her back, and her own profile attracted crickets (and worse). So, as any fan Based on the findings of Malwarebytes' Threat Review for , 40 million Windows business computers' threats were detected in In order to combat and avoid these kinds of attacks, Missing: online dating Online dating just never worked for me, for the same reasons you describe. I think part of it is a combination of paradox of choice and part of it is people just not having faith in technology It's not that men collectively send / of the messages; it's that each individual man sends times as many messages as an individual woman. I.e. it already corrects for there being more · Dating apps are so bad, the ratio of men:women matches would impress a red-pilled 4channer. Most men get somewhere like matches a week and most women get ... read more
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I would really prefer not to work with anyone who openly and gleefully calls themselves an anarcho-capitalist. I probably work with some people that hold similar views, but by separating our personal and work lives, we can work productively together without needing to confront that. Different strokes for different folks though, or something, I guess. No offense taken whatsoever. I will note that "open" is not the same thing as "aggressive". I'm not trying to convert anyone, and I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable at work.
For one thing, I'm an empathetic person and don't like to think that I've unintentionally offended someone. For another if someone is working with me, by definition we're contributing toward the same things.
Alienating them would harm damage that cooperative action, and I wouldn't be there if I didn't think it was right. People's actions are what I care about, not their reasons for them.
At a previous employer I was working to increase access to scientific publications and supporting materials to the general public. One of the reasons I think that's important is because much of the work is funded by taxes, and I view it as much worse to use tax dollars for private gain than to use it and at least make the results available to anyone. Several of my coworkers were authoritarian socialists of various stripes.
Their reasons for wanting to make that stuff available were wholly different from mine - but we shared a common cause. We'd discuss politics sometimes over beers or after a "crunch time" when we were all in the office at 2am and a bit delirious, but otherwise it just didn't come up. I know I'm an extreme minority politically. I know many of the people I work with and interact with on a daily basis hold positions antithetical to my own. I have zero desire to "confront" that.
Discuss it? Sure, if they're open to it. I'm happy to debate if someone wants to do so and if they're similarly willing to not make it personal , because that's how I arrived at my positions.
Metaphorically, I feel like my positions have been forged over time by repeatedly beaten against the anvil of others' positions. Where they were deformed, they were weak. I modified them and repeated the process.
At 35 years old, I feel like my views are fairly rigid - but that doesn't mean they are unchangeable, and it's because I continually do my best to test them and look for weaknesses. To me, a good political discussion is one where I come away with something to think about that I hadn't considered before.
A great one would be where an inconsistency in my positions was pointed out to me. I actively try to avoid this conversations with coworkers, because many people aren't comfortable with them.
That's OK. If they change their mind later I'm happy to oblige, but it's not like forcing people to argue politics is something desirable. pretendscholar on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. An-arch means without order. Ancaps believe in private property and hierarchy as a beneficial and necessary feature in society. Anarchists traditionally believe in equality as an intrinsic good. dontbenebby on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—].
To me, that seems like a cultural thing unique to Silicon Valley Reminds me more of DC. msoad on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. I think this is an "old people's thinking" perspective. Younger generation are way more open about their dating life than us. They openly talk about their dating life at work or friends group. They don't mind getting matched with a coworker or classmate. tyre on Sept 5, root parent next [—].
How old is old? I'm 28 and would not use this because I don't trust Facebook. My little brother is 16 and I know he won't use this because no one he knows uses Facebook. I don't even think he has an account. They're all on Snapchat and IG. I was talking to him about this last week. They all think of Facebook as for a different generation.
As stale. I feel similarly and know a lot of my circle does too. Except for events and sometimes messaging, nothing happens there. JesseAldridge on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. Is this really true? I heard from someone at Facebook that while teenagers say they don't use Facebook, if you look at the stats, they definitely do. adjkant on Sept 6, root parent next [—]. Very true in my experience. If you're a Facebook employee you may see that number of signups number and go "yeah they are using it" but the amount of use is VERY different from what I can tell.
Generally I'm very in agreement with the parent: The older won't want to use Facebook for dating, the younger would never look to Facebook. That said, I'd go even farther and say the original claims are offbase here. Not only that, Facebook knows this. Instagram launched "close friends" explicitly because everyone was using "sinstas" and "finstas" to post to a smaller subset of people.
Anyone I know on Hinge would laugh you out of the room if you asked them to switch to Facebook dating. NoodleIncident on Sept 6, root parent next [—]. DAU and MAU are what they base their user numbers and big milestones on. Wrong verbiage, point still stands. Probably a decent number of MAU on Facebook in that range but logging in and checking one thing twice a month is a big usage difference from daily or semi daily sessions that last for minutes, not seconds.
I'm "active" almost every day, but the majority of my sessions are below 20 seconds. They mean nothing to Facebook, and they mean nothing to me. Facebook lost the value it had for me. jedberg on Sept 6, root parent prev next [—]. Another anecdata, but our kid's babysitter also 16 doesn't have a Facebook account, and neither does her twin sister.
They both have IG and Snap though. She said the same thing: "Facebook is for old people". Also my 20 year old cousin didn't have a FB account until he went to college and was forced to get one to join some local FB groups.
But he only uses it for that. Otherwise he's on IG and Snap. They use FB Messenger for sure. From what I hear it's still popular among younger cohorts. PunchTornado on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. and still fb grows and grows and grows, be it instagram, whatsup or the blue app, facebook doesn't seem affected by opinions of hacker news people. in many countries it is basically the internet wether you like it or not.
My comment was specifically about Facebook. com and acknowledged that younger users are moving to instagram. I didn't say younger people are leaving all Facebook-owned subsidiaries. Similarly, I referenced my circle of friends—who are not hacker news people—as not using Facebook either. seisvelas on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. I think in a marketers mind, you are from the outbound Millenial generation rather than the current 'young' Generation Z or Zoomers as they're called in the Wojak meme world.
Which is why I shared the opinions and behaviours of my brother, who is He's that next generation. sterlind on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. OkCupid's "hide my profile from straight people" feature is fantastic for exactly this reason. Pity the site's fallen out of favor, it's the one dating app I felt comfortable with.
yodon on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. It's not a generational thing, it's called being in your 20's. Those currently well past their 20's talked openly about their dating when they were 20, too. dbg on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. Do people under 25 even use Facebook? I mean most of them see it as another LinkedIn for sharing Granny Photos. I was on Bumble a little late at night kinda mindlessly swiping girl looked cute little familiar Instantly realize as it chimes with "boom" that it was my boss.
Nope nope nope, delete the whole thing and never return. Ha, and the bigger problem I guess is that I don't really trust any of these sites to link them to Facebook or LinkedIn. They all seem fundamentally scammy and spammy. I've had some fun with Bumble. yeah I don't even trust it with my Spotify playlists. Barrin92 on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. they don't mind now. One of the big problems with digital transparency is that this information will be hard to get rid off if they ever wish to in the future.
Is openness about past relationships in the workplace still a good idea if it leads to some sort of office intrigue a year or two down the line? thrownaway on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. That is a HUGE generalization. You may be open about your dating life, but that doesn't mean everyone is nor do they want it to be associated with their professional life. True in point, say you are into a kink, do you want everyone in your social circle knowing about it?
KaoruAoiShiho on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. Yeah it's a load of assumptions, I'm chalking it more up to a "socially anxious person's thinking" than "old" person's thinking.
For many people I think being able to smoothly integrate their existing social life into a dating app is a godsend. ummonk on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. Right, I mean secret crush seems like a real improvement over the status quo in its ability to discover potential relationships without risking making existing friendships awkward. twic on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. You would think. Those of us who have been wasting time on the internet for long enough remember the Secret Crush Meme from LiveJournal , which worked just like this.
It was great up until someone realised they could just say they had a crush on everyone they knew to get a list of who had crushes on them, without any genuine reciprocity of the crush. If you could figure out a way to make it somehow costly to falsely say you have a crush on someone, this might work, but until then, this is game-theoretically wince-inducing.
skinnymuch on Sept 6, root parent next [—]. mwilliaams on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. Maybe just limit the number of people you can have a crush on at once. lbotos on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. Yes, but also, young people also use may different digital personas "just like us".
taude on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. I didn't think young people used the Facebook brand anymore? If all the stories that have been published about that are to be believed. n8henry on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. They don't.
They should have called this Instagram Dating, but Zuck doesn't want to admit that the Facebook brand is no longer "cool". aylmao on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. I think dating being "cool" is dangerous territory, and probably why Facebook dating didn't exist until now. That's Tinder territory, and tinder doesn't have a great reputation as an app that's "healthy".
bitbuilder on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. I have plenty of people in my extended friend group who are in their mid to late 20s, and most of them are still quite active on FB. Nobody thinks it's cool or fun anymore, of course.
But it's still the go-to spot for sharing life events, family news, anything you want to brag about really. Or any vacation pictures that you'd like grandma and grandpa to see. IG is still image driven, so it's not a platform you can easily use for relaying text based information to your social network. tayo42 on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. Mid to late 20s are the old people everyone's talking. That age group was in high school when Facebook was getting popular Young is like current high school and college.
romanhn on Sept 17, root parent prev next [—]. skinnymuch on Sept 6, root parent prev next [—]. Late 20s is def old I can personally attest to that. Mid 20s might be too? FillardMillmore on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. It makes me wonder how sensitive generation Z is to privacy concerns. It would seem to me that there would be vast differences between that generation and say, Gen X and Boomers who for a long time refused to share credit card numbers with e-commerce sites.
Perhaps the true success of this feature will become apparent with the coming Generation s , assuming Facebook manages to maintain its position as the premier social networking site. ses on Sept 5, root parent next [—].
Boomers I know can't even conceive of how privacy has been eroded. Sure they won't share cc numbers with ecommerce sites but they have no problem giving up every detail of their life to facebook. mywittyname on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—].
I think they will be even more sensitive to privacy and understand better about wearing a different mask for different groups. They grew up with this understanding that FB was where their parents are, thus were conscious about curating their image.
Likewise, I'm sure they will continue to treat other social media with the same scrutiny. People in their 30s grew up in an era where FB allowed only college students. And they were old enough not to really care once it became open to their parents. pmart on Sept 6, root parent prev next [—]. I would say they are a lot more sensitive.
They witnessed all the millennials post anything and everything on social media at first with little regard future consequences. I think there is a much better cognitive understanding that anything you post is permanent versus in kace91 on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. reply Coworkers and classmates aren't the problem. For young people, facebook is where mom and grandma is. Not that you're gonna match with them, but just sharing the name is a turn off.
carbocation on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. Counterpoint: Finsta accounts. Personal observation: It depends on the environment and not the age range. browningstreet on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. but maybe: until they get older JorgeGT on Sept 5, parent prev next [—].
From their privacy page, interesting bit: You can also choose how you want to present yourself to potential matches, like whether you provide different information than you have on your Facebook profile. ocdtrekkie on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. There are definitely upsides to this, like being able to put your general geographic area than your exact town which you might have on Facebook, for instance.
But I'm curious also if it is usable to be downright dishonest. For one, I think people will be less willing to lie in a form where one company can see both profiles, but on the other side, it comes down to what Facebook lets you change.
Hopefully they won't let your profile specify two different ages, for instance. zelon88 on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. I see where you're coming from. This is exactly why Tinder is so popular. Just because I go out on a date with someone doesn't mean I want to be friends with them on Facebook.
galfarragem on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. That's true for casual dating. By the other hand on older demographics, I think they nailed it: I suspect among older people, casual dating is less relevant, so they are not afraid of adding eachother as friends. And they don't need to install anything else.. jonnycomputer on Sept 5, root parent next [—].
The ad's photograph isn't targeted at older people. passivepinetree on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. That's a common mistake. Ads don't always and you could argue rarely show their target demographic. Easy example: ever seen an overweight person in a fast food commercial? ansible on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. Easier example: toys for kids. They'll usually use slightly older kids in a toy advertisement than the actual target demographic they're trying to sell to.
Part of that is that kids generally don't want to be seen as playing with toys for younger kids. reaperducer on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. I see plenty of overweight people in ads for diabetes treatments. I see plenty of fit people in ads for workout machines. Right now I see an ad on the side of a bus encouraging people to get free STD testing, and it shows people dancing at a club.
There are aspirational ads, but the use of "rare" in your comment doesn't reflect reality. kube-system on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. The era of 'supersize me' fast food marketing is long gone. Most fast food restaurants are not targeting that specific of a market anymore, they're aiming at a much large cross-section of the population.
A better example would be an all-you-can-eat buffet. dublinben on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. This reality isn't represented in advertising for obvious reasons. kube-system on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. Specifically targeting a population, and the coincidental demographics of that population are two entirely different things. There are plenty of fast food ads targeting health-conscious consumers.
also, most large fast food companies also have a significant presence in multiple countries. jonnycomputer on Sept 9, root parent prev next [—].
why would you target a dying demographic? facebook users of my generation started FB in college, and have stuck on. targeting younger people is FB is smart, unless it wants to be come the next AOL. There are well established incumbents for both serious dating and casual dating.
It might be more convenient for the older people looking for more serious relationships. tryitnow on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. I agree, but I think the "dating self" and the "facebook self" overlap a lot for most people.
It's also important for a dating app to have critical mass. Almost everyone is on FB, only a fraction of those people are on IG. jonknee on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. Among all people sure, but among people in the dating demographic? I would not be surprised at all if more people in prime dating ages are on IG than FB especially in an active manner, do young people post on FB in any real way?
StrangeDoctor on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. Facebook has pitched this showing young people so I assumed that's their market. I guess the boomer dating market is probably underserved, maybe that's what they're actually going for.
jacobush on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. I agree for I what I assume you mean by prime dating ages, but think there are more prime dating ages which are not so "prime" in other ways, if you will. roland35 on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. I think it also would be too complicated for many people to keep track of, and I am sure it would be easy to make a mistake of typing something in the wrong profile! I certainly wouldn't want my grandma to know I like long walks on the beach!
technofiend on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. It also seems particularly poorly timed when a breach exposing Facebook user phone numbers just made hacker news yesterday.
Does anyone really want to trust a dating service that aggressively collects anything and everything about a person and may accidentally share it? Sounds like a stalker's paradise. saagarjha on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. Unfortunately, I doubt many outside of Hacker News heard about this. Like the BBC? scarface74 on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. Facebook has had plenty of data breaches and in the aggregate no one cared enough to delete their account.
technofiend on Sept 8, root parent next [—]. That's demonstrably untrue: there are articles at the top of Google results about this very subject including a guide on how to do it on The New York Times that references the breaches. Anecdotally I deleted mine over privacy concerns but it was prior to the breaches. My wife didn't like the fact that friends of friends could see photos of her.
She didn't know those people and didn't like it. I was more exasperated by Facebook tweaking privacy knobs through updates and was always to share more not less.
So I deleted my account since I couldn't promise that even if I choose privacy settings today that protected her privacy they'd be there tomorrow. Ironically she's still a Facebook customer and has no clue how to change privacy settings, but that's between her and Facebook.
ryanmarsh on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. FTA Starting today, you can choose to opt into Facebook Dating and create a Dating profile separate from your main profile Facebook's loss of interest amongst Gen Z notwithstanding, your profile is apparently different. So glad I'm married and not having to date in this online zoo. aylmao on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. I actually think it's a strange but probably a solid strategy under a couple of assumptions: 1. They want to differentiate their dating product.
There's a sector of the population interested in dating but that at the moment is underserved, too shy to try it, or just on the fence about putting the effort to try it out. What this does is it essentially puts a dating app on everyone's phone, reducing the friction it takes to give online dating a shot. It also "feels" different and more serious. Anecdotally Facebook seems to be, amongst my circles, a lot about life events or important stuff and less about the casual, funny, edgy, etc persona.
By associating that image with their dating platform, they give it a strong identity for the get go as a place for serious relationships. Would it? I feel like Instagram is better off being about friends and oneself, and it could be tarnished by involving dating.
What dating "identity" would befall upon it? Would it lean on the side of Tinder— superficial, more about hookups than long-lasting relationships, etc? I associate instagram with influencers, young people as in, teens , etc a lot so branding-wise it doesn't make that much sense to me personally, though of course, this is just my opinion. wheelerwj on Sept 5, parent prev next [—].
VWWHFSfQ on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. they understand it perfectly well. reaperducer on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. They just don't care. vokep on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. It seems they do care, but about actively destroying any idea of privacy. Zuckerberg has said before that he feels people need to be accountable and one way of doing that is forcing us all into a singular identity. kostarelo on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. I even embrace the fact to show the same persona everywhere.
I haven't been actively using FB for the past few years though but maybe this is something that newer generations have already concluded in. kelnos on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. This is a very personal thing. For some people I would guess most people , it matters, and they -- at the very least -- present a different face when at work vs. out with friends. Many people have further stratification.
I do get what you mean, though. As I've gotten older, I've found that maintaining different personas is just exhausting and not really worth it. But I also don't have anything in my life that I'd be embarrassed about depending on audience, and I don't consider myself a member of any underrepresented groups or subcultures that the mainstream would consider "weird" or somehow undesirable. So it's easy for me, which isn't true for everyone else.
scarface74 on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. suyash on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. I think you misunderstood Facebook's strategy here completely. The whole point of this feature is to add value to Facebook's main app, as this is a feature in the app and not a separate app itself, it makes the product more sticky and less likely people will delete their facebook account in future. buboard on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. In my country facebook is by far the 1 dating site people use.
In fact "Facebook dating" is reduntant. dlivingston on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. Can you explain this further? buboard on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. depends on the dating culture. Casual dating apps are not popular here, so people use facebook messaging. Okay, walk me through this - do you, say, see a cute girl friend of a friend, someone in your city, etc. that you might fancy, and just randomly send her a message? cocochanel on Sept 6, root parent next [—]. You casually introduce yourself, mention a thing or two in common same groups for instance , and ask if they'd be interested in getting to know each other —assuming you have a solid FB profile and not something fake.
Pretty much like you'd walk up to a person in a real life in a social setting and say Hi. Many of my friends met their girlfriends like that. If you don't get a reply then that's your answer, no hard feelings. If they're a friend of a friend, well, you just ask your friend for an introduction.
I don't know how things are in the US, but it's not considered awkward at all in my country. I've had women approach me in this same way as well. buboard on Sept 6, root parent prev next [—]. This is mostly between friends-of-friends , not for randomly adding people for hookups. Typically it involves sending a friend request followed by chat.
thecleaner on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. So these people dont like FB the product not FB the company. That feels like a very restrained response. I protested by just moving to Signal and never using insta and boy does it suck if other people wont do the same.
meerita on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. I'm sure they have enough data to support this new business. mogadsheu on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. benguild on Sept 6, parent prev next [—]. It makes sense. A lot of people only grant API access to dating apps and this would increase their app installs at a time of decline. creaghpatr on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. They can pull the API plug on their competitors which almost always use Facebook Login?
And invite FTC scrutiny? johnestar on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. it may be true in united states, but in other parts of the world, facebook dating could work. kinkrtyavimoodh on Sept 5, prev next [—]. I think HN should in particular not feel informed enough to comment on strategic benefit of product decisions like these, because the general HN opinion of FB which is at such odds at FB's place in society is enough to conclude that HN doesn't really understand FB.
HN is a SV or SV-adjacent bubble that takes pride in not having social media profiles and doesn't hesitate in boasting about it in every frigging thread, multiple times a day. In contrast, b millions around the world find value in social media every single day and use it for all kinds of applications. I am confident FB understands this much better than people like us here who can't think of any good use cases of social media without presenting 10 riders to assure the crowd that we hate FB.
asteli on Sept 5, parent next [—]. I take issue with your characterization of FB non-users on HN boasting about it. I deleted my FB years ago and I would never do such a thing. AndrewKemendo on Sept 5, root parent next [—].
I know we generally discourage humor and satire here but I think this comment nailed it in a very HNesque way. kelnos on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. Agreed, though I would take the possibly more charitable interpretation that many HNers get that FB understands the mainstream, but struggle to understand why the mainstream is the way it is.
Or they do understand the mainstream, but feel the need to rail against them for what they view as naïveté and short-term thinking. For me, I'm surprised it took FB this long to launch a dating feature.
Despite their decline in some demographics, they are still uniquely positioned to do a much more comprehensive I hesitate to say "better" job of connecting people on the romantic side than a random new dating startup, or even possibly one of the giants like Match.
Perhaps they've hesitated for so long because they were afraid FB users would be afraid of mixing their public FB life too closely with their dating life?
mav3rick on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. Totally agree. People on here saying it won't work. The first thing people from other apps check is a potential date's Instagram. jhanschoo on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. I don't know enough about FB's realistic position, but it is theoretically better positioned than specialized dating-app companies to provide a better matchmaking service.
Specialized dating services fail to provide value to their users once they are no longer in the dating market, whereas FB can continue to get involved in its users' lives post-dating, and arguably moreso when they experience a lifestyle change. For this reason, there is more room for the incentives of FB and those in the dating market to align, and so I welcome this.
wortelefant on Sept 6, parent prev next [—]. Agreed, I grudgingly understood the value of fb during volunteer work. Most grassroots refugee support initiatives were run by non tech savvy people. They created Facebook groups to communicate with people who wanted to help.
As there sometimes were right wing attacks against their work, they would not accept anyone into the group with an empty fb profile. They also used it for event planning, there are few alternatives to creating events on fb - meetup. com costs too much and does not have the same reach among volunteers. donatj on Sept 5, prev next [—].
This seems like something they should have added ten plus years ago, when their demo was primarily college kids. I know many people who were clamoring for it at the time.
It would have been an obvious addition as dating and relationships were a large part of the reason a lot of people used Facebook.
I half suspect this is an attempt to pull college kids back into Facebook. I think they missed their chance with this by a long shot. paxys on Sept 5, parent next [—].
This is what Facebook was ten years ago. The problem is dating wasn't as successfully monetized as it is today. have cracked that code, and Facebook wants to get in on it.
WhompingWindows on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. How is that correct? There was a good deal of dating-related activity happening, but the vast majority of FB back then was not related to dating.
paxys on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. The scene in The Social Network about adding relationship status to users' profile sums it up perfectly. Facebook was a large catalog of your friends, friends' friends, classmates, coworkers etc. Facebook was the largest dating site in the world the moment it got popular. I don't agree. Allowing someone to list their relationship status on their otherwise-non-dating-site profile is a far far cry from providing tools and UX to help people match with others they might be interested in.
Certainly people have found romantic partners on FB in the past 15 years, but I would view that as in spite of the lack of dating-related features. Up until now, FB has not been geared toward or especially useful as a dating platform, especially given the availability of dating apps that actually fill that niche.
I think FB Dating has the potential to be way more successful to a mainstream audience than nearly any dating app built to date, though. MegaButts on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. I can't believe you guys are arguing over whether or not Facebook used to be a dating site and nobody has mentioned the "poke" button. tgb29 on Sept 6, root parent next [—]. When I was in high school, back before the news feed, Facebook was the best way to flirt!
Too bad Facebook killed it when they started broadcasting everything you post. newsgremlin on Sept 6, root parent next [—]. This is why people defaulted to Snapchat shortly after. roland35 on Sept 5, parent prev next [—].
I agree! It seemed like a no-brainer back around but now with all of the bad press it seems less desirable to put your dating life on Facebook. hgtr on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. I always thought this was a really cool feature, and I wish they kept it.
It felt more personal. yorwba on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. mdrzn on Sept 6, root parent prev next [—]. I think you mean Bang with Friends. jayd16 on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. No way. This is looking at yesterday's decisions from today's zeitgeist. Without Grindr and Tinder and the other apps paving the way culturally, Facebook date would have creeped out their user base. pavlov on Sept 5, parent prev next [—].
Many of the college kids of are now divorced, with kids, and desperately trying to fit dating into their busy lives. I suspect that's a market potentially more easily attracted by the relative convenience of Facebook Dating compared to other services where you have to do more work to build up a profile and figure out UI, etiquette, etc.
cdolan on Sept 6, parent prev next [—]. I disagree. Do you know how hard it is to meet new people after the age of 25? The statistics, historically, are not in your favor!
ritchiea on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. That might have worked but college students already used FB as a defacto dating app and facebook still grew to be a monopoly without that feature. Now that facebook is out of favor with young people this might be a good way to increase engagement with older single people.
jrnichols on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. i agree with that. it almost seems like they're throwing their weight into an already way overcrowded market. Facebook's massive user base might make this a success. Depending on whether or not there's a fee involved.
basch on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. Is it that overcrowded? IAC and Spark own basically everything. Its like Ford and Chevy having 20 subbrands, but no one else makes cars. jrnichols on Sept 9, root parent next [—]. when things devolve into such specific niches as "farmersonly" and 'blackpeoplemeet" and stuff like that, I figure that it's overcrowded. The iTunes App Store alone has at least a dozen. Many of them non-IAC too. It's a lot. phil on Sept 5, parent prev next [—].
Older people need to date too. Maybe that's part of their angle? The existing dating app ecosystem doesn't seem great for older demographics. nasalgoat on Sept 5, prev next [—].
This has been live in Canada for some time in a "beta" incarnation, and from a purely product standpoint it is terrible. The UI is just bad. You cannot browse profiles, you must say "yes" or "no" and the decision is final. If you scroll down to read a profile more, when you pass, it leaves you in the same scroll spot in the next profile. This is User Interface level stuff.
The list of problems goes on from there. Everything about it says "throwaway add-on" that they haven't spent any real time on optimizing. I don't see this product really making a big dent in the Match bottom line. haunter on Sept 5, parent next [—]. So Tinder? nasalgoat on Sept 5, root parent next [—].
Yes, but on Tinder the profiles will re-appear later when you go back to swipe again. Other apps allow general browsing and better photo viewing too. dymk on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. Wait, are you saying that Tinder will show you accounts that you've swiped left on at a later date?
I have not found that to be the case. Yes, I've personally seen memorable profiles come back later. It's one way to make the app seem busier with more people. I wonder if this is people deleting and re-creating accounts? Or spam accounts using the same images? Oh, that might be possible.
I mostly remember the photos and not the details of the profile, which by design is pretty thin as it is.
peteretep on Sept 6, root parent prev next [—]. papito on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. Depending on your level of intoxication, you might swipe right the second time. benja on Sept 5, parent prev next [—]. Maybe this is a little unfair considering it was only a beta.
Isn't a cornerstone of agile to get an MVP in front of users and iterate on user feedback? It doesn't seem right to judge any software based on a beta experience alone. Sure, but even as a first pass I'd hoped that the devs would have used the other dating apps and tried to make the experience better based on that. I don't think anyone even looked based on what I see. It's clearly inferior to Tinder, Bumble and OKCupid's mobile apps just on basic usability.
If you're going to enter a space, shouldn't you try to do better than the market leaders? TallGuyShort on Sept 5, prev next [—]. erikig on Sept 5, parent next [—]. When the largest accompanying FB news headline is: "Over million Facebook users' phone numbers exposed" this feels like the most poorly timed product launch.
deminature on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. I assume they're thinking the groups of people that read security disclosure articles and those that would use FB dating are disjoint. They're probably not wrong. jerf on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. We overestimate change in the short-term but underestimate it in the long term. I find it easy to imagine a world where in years, Facebook is a complete non-entity, and for all the articles written that claim to understand why, nobody will actually be able to point at any small set of events as an explanation.
It could be the very small contributions of a lot of events. I physically don't live in SV or its bubble, and I can assure you, the news that Facebook isn't necessarily trustworthy is getting out there to "the masses". It isn't necessarily changing people habits yet, but the process is certainly started.
By the time it causes noticeable problems for Facebook, it may be too far progressed for them to do anything about it. I agree with you, but Facebook seems be aware and is mitigating using brands like Instagram and Whatsapp which average people don't associate with Facebook. If they keep acquiring undervalued social companies and downplaying their ownership, I could see them sticking around for quite a while unfortunately.
emteycz on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. Don't underestimate Facebook. I am sure they have stats that show that almost no one knows. Because almost no one knows - not even most IT professionals. lapnitnelav on Sept 5, root parent next [—]. Yeah, I don't know about underestimating them, I've been chatting back and forth with our FB account manager regarding our business needs for something in their Ad biz.
Turns out, they can't deliver on this pretty universal feature even Twitter has it , so huh yeah, let's talk about how great they are again. emteycz on Sept 6, root parent next [—]. I would guess that their business analysts are separate from their development team. joering2 on Sept 5, root parent prev next [—]. That's most likely how they were aiming this news. Honestly, if my Tinder swipes went public it wouldn't be an issue in the slightest. Its not a heart lock bound journal.
awinter-py 3 months ago next [—]. I mean 1 'stable matching' is not how anyone would describe the experience of using IRL meetup apps 2 at best gale-shapley is being used for ranking , not for preference inference; IMO they removed the 'have you met' feature guessing because users found it invasive and hated it , but would be interesting to use it for scheduling meeting slots, a resource problem more similar to med school matching.
What are the factors? Are some factors excluded? What can hinge and their cousins at match. they're definitely not just using the user settings toggles for preferences; at minimum, they must have a global rank for showing popular profiles at the top of the stack.
Also it makes sense this stuff is secret, it's a liability landmine. ddoolin 3 months ago parent next [—]. I was wondering the same thing re: 3. Some of it is answered in the article but it reads like it was written by a pop-tech blogger and obviously very light on details. The answer is there is no point, and Hinge knows that.
And why wouldn't they be? It seems like an incredibly easy target for aligning visual preferences without having to ask. senkora 3 months ago parent prev next [—]. jimmygrapes 3 months ago prev next [—]. If so, what is their monetization strategy? It is fairly clear that a successful result in a dating app means at least one less user, polygamy and "ENM" notwithstanding. I believe that some apps have used success and subsequent loss of user as marketing to "prove it works" but I haven't seen that tactic lately.
How does Hinge work? I know the tropes and standard advice hobbies, church, etc but it ain't working anymore. culopatin 3 months ago parent next [—]. I can say that me personally found Hinge much more effective in finding someone than all the other apps. Among my friends is the one with highest success rate of long term relationships. postingawayonhn 3 months ago parent prev next [—].
What they have done is pull out the most attractive users and put them in a 'Standouts' section. These users can only be liked by using a 'Rose'. Uses get one Rose every 48 hours I think and need to purchase more if they want to like more of the Standouts. cbhl 3 months ago parent prev next [—]. Hinge was acquired by Match Group in June So, no. jimmygrapes 3 months ago root parent next [—]. Well alright then. Guess it's back to pretending I give a shit about yoga and feminist books.
dymk 3 months ago root parent next [—]. carabiner 3 months ago root parent prev next [—]. Performative feminism is eternal. Lewton 3 months ago parent prev next [—]. I was talking to someone the other day who told me he was dating a woman he met on Match I believe this was several years ago and noticed her profile was still active after they had decided to be exclusive.
He asked what was going on. She told him Match gave her a really good deal on a year membership, but only if her account remained active. This gives guys the impression they have a lot more options on these sites than they actually do. alphabettsy 3 months ago parent prev next [—]. dumpsterdiver 3 months ago prev next [—]. Can you imagine what it would have looked like if dating apps existed in the war ravaged nations of Eurasia post World War II?
Ladies would have been fighting tooth and nail for a good man, because they were hard to find after the world went to war with itself. screye 3 months ago parent next [—]. I have heard factoids that the emphasis on heavy makeup and dressing up among Eastern European women was as a result of the dearth of eligible young men post WW2. whichfawkes 3 months ago parent prev next [—]. Please don't go starting a war, mmk? armchairhacker 3 months ago prev next [—].
Dating apps are so bad, the ratio of men:women matches would impress a red-pilled 4channer. Most men get somewhere like matches a week and most women get somewhere like Because a lot of men like to swipe right on nearly everyone and buy passes which get them unlimited swipes.
On top of that, the bios suck. Even on Hinge. Online dating sucks. Or, you can try meeting people online but not in a surface-level dating-oriented site. Plenty of people formed couples through discord or their favorite video games. mrwh 3 months ago parent next [—]. Dating does suck! Though I'm not sure that dating apps suck more than what they replaced - pubs and bars really. I'm old enough to have dated before apps were the default and it wasn't exactly a less superficial time.
xxs 3 months ago root parent next [—]. Usually there are other activities available, e. itake 3 months ago root parent next [—]. My personal experience with bars is the ratio still isn't great at face-value counting men vs women and even worse when you dive deeper to consider the girls-night-out groups with women interested exclusively at spending time with their friends rather than looking for their partner think bachelorette parties with half the girls in stable relationships.
Men and women? in IRL situations must overcome the barrier of: "is this person single or is their bf at home or in the bathroom"? Whereas dating apps provide an explicit context as to why both people are there.
robocat 3 months ago root parent prev next [—]. Personally, it seems more like selecting for an alcoholic, although that might say more about me than the people I meet at bars? I am not sure I would recommend going to bars to find a partner. Having a drink in a bar to decompress after work is hardly being an alcoholic. robocat 3 months ago root parent next [—].
I am talking about my opinion, in my country, at my age, at the bars I go to, for my definition of alcoholic. mariusor 3 months ago root parent prev next [—]. I think that as an average, alcoholics would rather not waste their money paying for alcohol in bars. Drinking cheap is more important than socializing fore people with an actual addiction. sytelus 3 months ago parent prev next [—]. I think you don't understand that you cannot escape the consequences of human mating behavior by making dating online to offline.
You can go to bar and get some beer goggles for a while, but it will wear down eventually. Ask why. mxkopy 3 months ago root parent next [—]. In nonwestern countries, polygamy is acceptable. I think it's obvious that people have preferences, and will seek partners that match those preferences better.
But even if that's true, people have different preferences. People don't adhere to some universal rating system. DeathArrow 3 months ago root parent prev next [—].
jseban 3 months ago root parent next [—]. Because of the biological asymmetry between the sexes. A man can have thousands of children, and women can only have a small amount.
It's what drives natural selection and evolution of the species. Some part of the men are supposed to get rejected. eftychis 3 months ago root parent next [—]. I know this will be hard to swallow for a lot: No polygamy is not stable and that is why it is outlawed in a lot of countries. Consider that men physiologically have a drive to produce wealth and "grow" to attract and sustain a family. Nations I hear want that. What do you think throughout history the men that could not find a match did?
Needless to say a peaceful nation does not want that.
It's not that men collectively send / of the messages; it's that each individual man sends times as many messages as an individual woman. I.e. it already corrects for there being more · Dating apps are so bad, the ratio of men:women matches would impress a red-pilled 4channer. Most men get somewhere like matches a week and most women get · What I mean is the people online who are dating and talking about dating online are more likely to be experience the agony of Eros. Than those who are dating or in a Online dating just never worked for me, for the same reasons you describe. I think part of it is a combination of paradox of choice and part of it is people just not having faith in technology Facebook was a large catalog of your friends, friends' friends, classmates, coworkers etc., and showed you their profiles, pictures, if they were dating, who they were dating, their interests Based on the findings of Malwarebytes' Threat Review for , 40 million Windows business computers' threats were detected in In order to combat and avoid these kinds of attacks, Missing: online dating ... read more
average-looking women are disadvantaged because men appear to be far more selective than women are: Absolutely agree. A better example would be an all-you-can-eat buffet. Grad student with minimal income living at home. You can't stop it, but you can at least let people know that the whole romantic ecosystem from hollywood to PUAs is basically a marketing scam. It would have been an obvious addition as dating and relationships were a large part of the reason a lot of people used Facebook.LyndsySimon on Sept 5, root parent next [—] I agree that their intentions are good. when things devolve into such specific niches as "farmersonly" and 'blackpeoplemeet" and stuff like that, I figure that it's overcrowded. Nowadays however it IS becoming possible for nonmonogamous socieites to survive due to our superior technology. It's a trap. I physically don't live in SV or its bubble, and I can assure you, the news that Facebook isn't necessarily trustworthy is getting out there to "the masses", hacker news online dating. Some of it is answered in the article but it reads like it was written by a pop-tech blogger and obviously very light on details. Someone like hacker news online dating above gets nearly 5 times as many messages as a typical woman and 28 times as many messages as a woman at the low end of our curve.